In my increasing efforts to branch out from my ever-multimedia-saturated posting, I’ve decided to also review things that take shorter to digest (er…ingest). Food. And what better way to start than sweet, delicious candy? And what better candy than…

Gummy bears! Specifically, Wolfgang Gummy Bears! I got these puppies (not really puppies) on Easter 2006. They came from a fundraiser catalog. The only candy I eat nowadays is of the fat-free variety, so gummy treats and marshmallow-based substances make up the bulk of my snack-food empire. Bears are, of course, the classic gummy shape, but probably the least fun. Nowadays you can get gummies in all different sorts of shapes, from the also-classic worms to human organs.

Pertinent facts: Serving size: 18 bears. Calories: 130. Fat: 0g. This is not a vegan product, as it contains gelatin and beeswax in its ingredients.

The colors of these bears were red, clear, green, orange, and yellow. The flavors were difficult to distinguish, but a quick scan of Wikipedia would indicate that the flavors are raspberry, pineapple, strawberry, orange, and lemon respectively.

I can’t say I was particularly pleased with these gummies. Perhaps it’s due to the fact that I left my bears unopened from the day I received them in April until a point in mid-December, but the bears were coated in some sort of white, crusty dust. Additionally, they were stiff and chewy. The flavors were difficult to distinguish. All in all, these bears were bupkus.

I think, though, that it was not age that made these candies poor. I have a separate bag of gummies I received on the exact same day (made by a different company, natch), and there is no evidence of white dust through the clear package. Additionally, light squeezing proves that the alternate gummies remain squishy and chewy, as opposed to tough. Instead, my guess is that Wolfgang has a recipe for their gummies that provides for longer shelf/shipping/storage life at the expense of the product’s quality.

There are certainly better gummy bears out there, so avoid Wolfgang’s at all costs if you’re in the mood.

Link: Wolfgang Candy