Archive for July, 2008
Poetry
Here is some poetry I wrote. This is from college.
Fatty
You spend your days
trapped
by the reflection
in your funhouse glass eye.
You have a problem.
Angles
a slipshod sculpture of poorly-welded and rusty metal
in a case by the door
not on display
but ogled nonetheless
by bespectacled connoisseurs of nothing but their own opinions
who cluck their tongues
and tell you
what is and
what isn’t
artful
while they [...]
Arts and Farts and Crafts - Saying Goodbye
Arts and Farts and Crafts is a weekly artistic challenge. Every Thursday, a new prompt will be posted here on Ugly Food for an Ugly Dude. Then, you will create some sort of media based on the prompt. Is it a rhyming couplet? A ten-page story? A photograph? A drawing? A recipe? Whatever you’d like. [...]
Read More..>>Tuesdays with Dorie - New Car Galette
Today I finally got my new car–a 2008 Honda Civic Hybrid. This means a lot of different things to me. First, I can give my mom back her pimpin’ Astro Van. Second, I can feel free to drive where I want when I want. Third, I can finally put the horrifying, traumatic car wreck behind [...]
Read More..>>Arts and Farts and Crafts - The Wind Beneath My Wings
Arts and Farts and Crafts is a weekly artistic challenge. Every Thursday, a new prompt will be posted here on Ugly Food for an Ugly Dude. Then, you will create some sort of media based on the prompt. Is it a rhyming couplet? A ten-page story? A photograph? A drawing? A recipe? Whatever you’d like. [...]
Read More..>>Tuesdays with Dorie - Cherry Something Cobbler
The comment turn-out was huge for my last TWD entry. Maybe if I make stuff explode every time, people will continue to love me. I just got back from a five-day vacation, so I have a lot of reading to do. I’ll be meme-ing and reading your blogs in the near future. At any rate, [...]
Read More..>>Laser Meme
This is a very special moment in my blogsistence. I’ve been tagged in a meme! A MEME! A meme for me.
My very close, personal friend MacDuff (hey, it’s not every day somebody memes you for a meme!) memed me, saying, “I like to think [Ugly Food for an Ugly Dude] is George Clooney’s personal blog, [...]
Arts and Farts and Crafts: Stealing People
Arts and Farts and Crafts is a weekly artistic challenge. Every Thursday, a new prompt will be posted here on Ugly Food for an Ugly Dude. Then, you will create some sort of media based on the prompt. Is it a rhyming couplet? A ten-page story? A photograph? A drawing? A recipe? Whatever you’d like. [...]
Read More..>>Tuesdays with Dorie - Chocolate Pudding Disaster
Last week’s Double Crusted Blueberry Pie was DIFFICULT. I was so happy to hear that this week’s would be chocolate pudding, a recipe I’ve made dozens of times.
1) Open packet of pudding mix.
2) Add milk and/or water.
3) Shake shake shake shake shake.
Okay, so it’s bound to be more difficult than that, but not much, right?
Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
I [...]
Things I Love
Black marble composition books. I own boxes full of them, and they’re pretty much all empty. There’s something nostalgic about these things. I was forced to write “journal entries” in these during Sunday School when I was little. I remember quite clearly answering a prompt about Moses with a longwinded answer about Moses Malone. I [...]
Read More..>>Arts and Farts and Crafts Week 4 - Naked in NYC
Arts and Farts and Crafts is a weekly artistic challenge. Every Thursday, a new prompt will be posted here on Ugly Food for an Ugly Dude. Then, you will create some sort of media based on the prompt. Is it a rhyming couplet? A ten-page story? A photograph? A drawing? A recipe? Whatever you’d like. [...]
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