Archive for July, 2008
Poetry
Here is some poetry I wrote. This is from college. Fatty You spend your days trapped by the reflection in your funhouse glass eye. You have a problem. Angles a slipshod sculpture of poorly-welded and rusty metal in a case by the door not on display but ogled nonetheless by bespectacled connoisseurs of nothing but [...]
Arts and Farts and Crafts – Saying Goodbye
Arts and Farts and Crafts is a weekly artistic challenge. Every Thursday, a new prompt will be posted here on Ugly Food for an Ugly Dude. Then, you will create some sort of media based on the prompt. Is it a rhyming couplet? A ten-page story? A photograph? A drawing? A recipe? Whatever you’d like. [...]
Tuesdays with Dorie – New Car Galette
Today I finally got my new car–a 2008 Honda Civic Hybrid. This means a lot of different things to me. First, I can give my mom back her pimpin’ Astro Van. Second, I can feel free to drive where I want when I want. Third, I can finally put the horrifying, traumatic car wreck behind [...]
Arts and Farts and Crafts – The Wind Beneath My Wings
Arts and Farts and Crafts is a weekly artistic challenge. Every Thursday, a new prompt will be posted here on Ugly Food for an Ugly Dude. Then, you will create some sort of media based on the prompt. Is it a rhyming couplet? A ten-page story? A photograph? A drawing? A recipe? Whatever you’d like. [...]
Tuesdays with Dorie – Cherry Something Cobbler
The comment turn-out was huge for my last TWD entry. Maybe if I make stuff explode every time, people will continue to love me. I just got back from a five-day vacation, so I have a lot of reading to do. I’ll be meme-ing and reading your blogs in the near future. At any rate, [...]
Laser Meme
This is a very special moment in my blogsistence. I’ve been tagged in a meme! A MEME! A meme for me. My very close, personal friend MacDuff (hey, it’s not every day somebody memes you for a meme!) memed me, saying, “I like to think [Ugly Food for an Ugly Dude] is George Clooney’s personal [...]
Arts and Farts and Crafts: Stealing People
Arts and Farts and Crafts is a weekly artistic challenge. Every Thursday, a new prompt will be posted here on Ugly Food for an Ugly Dude. Then, you will create some sort of media based on the prompt. Is it a rhyming couplet? A ten-page story? A photograph? A drawing? A recipe? Whatever you’d like. [...]
Tuesdays with Dorie – Chocolate Pudding Disaster
Last week’s Double Crusted Blueberry Pie was DIFFICULT. I was so happy to hear that this week’s would be chocolate pudding, a recipe I’ve made dozens of times. 1) Open packet of pudding mix. 2) Add milk and/or water. 3) Shake shake shake shake shake. Okay, so it’s bound to be more difficult than that, [...]
Things I Love
Black marble composition books. I own boxes full of them, and they’re pretty much all empty. There’s something nostalgic about these things. I was forced to write “journal entries” in these during Sunday School when I was little. I remember quite clearly answering a prompt about Moses with a longwinded answer about Moses Malone. I [...]
Arts and Farts and Crafts Week 4 – Naked in NYC
Arts and Farts and Crafts is a weekly artistic challenge. Every Thursday, a new prompt will be posted here on Ugly Food for an Ugly Dude. Then, you will create some sort of media based on the prompt. Is it a rhyming couplet? A ten-page story? A photograph? A drawing? A recipe? Whatever you’d like. [...]