Tuesdays With Dorie - Double Crusted Blueberry Pie
I’m learning to bake through the power of Internet bloggery. The gist is, every Tuesday I will post about a different baked good from Baking: From My Home To Yours by Dorie Greenspan. This is all part of the wonderful Tuesdays With Dorie blogroll. You’ll see my disasters and far-less-frequent triumphs at the oven.
I started [...]
“And it was the best thing I ever done!”
I was perusing my non-food blogroll, I stumbled across Hump Day Stories, which had a wonderful, food-relevant post this morning in regards to the late, apparently-great Williams Smoke House ribs.
I swear to God, [the rib] was so good that I dropped it and stared at it. My eyes were wide. I was looking at the [...]
Mememmeme
I was not tagged for this meme! Instead, I stole it unceremoniously from one of the three hundred food blogs I read, iheartfood4thought.
It is like a MySpace vanity survey, except I have invited it into my food-related house and OH SCREW IT this is a MySpace vanity bulletin.
On Culinary Arts…
Q. What is your salad [...]
Numbers
Rabbits have a life expectancy of 5 to 15 years. Rats are expected to live from 2 to 3 years before they die of old age. These animals are domesticated, kept in the safest of conditions; they have doctors that specialize in animal care; they are sustained by diets that are specifically tailored to the [...]
Read More..>>Self-Inflicted
Chunks of tender beef deep fried with batter and sautéed with orange peel and scallions in spicy sauce.
My best friend was a self-mutilator. A cutter. For years, he would draw and trace, trace and retrace the lines on his arm with a kitchen knife. With the silver and shiny blade he would rip at the [...]
THE BEEFSTEAK CHRONICLES: One if by land, two if by BEEFSTEAK
For the past five days, I’ve felt like a new mother, getting rid of that ten pound bulge in her stomach for the first time in nine months. This mission, Operation Beefsteak, was my offspring, the combination of my hard work and semen. After Chef Trey broke the news to me gently and erotically last [...]
Read More..>>THE BEEFSTEAK CHRONICLES: A BEEFSTEAK in the hand is worth two in the bush.
Disaster strikes at ground zero of Operation Beefsteak.
Arriving at the dining facilities today, we made a beeline for the comments board. The card, that sweet, succulent comment card, was missing. No response, no acknowledgement. Obviously the conspiracy has decided to track us down and kill us. Luckily, they don’t know Brad and I by [...]
THE BEEFSTEAK CHRONICLES: Why are there so many songs about BEEFSTEAK?
A conspiracy is afoot.
I’ve received a response to my simple, innocent suggestion. That suggestion? Bring on the Beefsteak! Unfortunately, the dining hall staff decided to play dumb. To recap, here is my original message.
Dear Kriner Staff:
It would be much appreciated if you could make Beefsteak a permanent menu fixture.
I then proceeded [...]
Read More..>>THE BEEFSTEAK CHRONICLES: Wherefore art thou BEEFSTEAK?
Phase one of Operation Beefsteak is complete.
That’s right, Operation Beefsteak.
Ever since last year, I have been infatuated with the cut of meat mysteriously called “Beefsteak” at our school’s dining halls. The name itself is pretty bizarre–if you have a cut of beef, it’s a steak. If you order something called steak, you’ll be [...]
Read More..>>A Multicolored Dialogue Between a Chef and a Patron of Her Fine Restaurant-type Establishment
“So you want to know what makes my meatloaf so irresistible?
You want to know why you get the urge for more and more meatloaf until your paper sack of a stomach explodes?
You REALLY want to know the secret ingredient?
Well, I’ll tell you.
The secret ingredient is love.”
“Love?”
“Yes, love. Love is the secret ingredient.
The other secret [...]